I know in the last post I made coming back sound pretty bad. And it was very seriously difficult coming back after having tried the most radical move I could to escape. The first couple of days, I did have a familiar dizziness and anxiety left over from last year. However, that has really dialed down as I get back into things. But I have made some changes in my approach and attitude that make a world of difference. It will all be good, no matter what the future.
When the new teacher came, she was not sure what to do so she let the paras take a lead. This is actually a good thing, because it helped the paraprofessionals form a more cohesive and competent team. When I walked in, they already had several things underway, and were doing all of the changing, positioning and feeding. It made me realize how much I needed to delegate down that I did not do last year. I tried to do everything last year, and it was frustrating me.
I also started the year last year loaded for bear even before the first student walked in. And then got more angry as the year went on! I’m not doing that this year. Yes, there are a lot of things to be angry and insulted about. But I can’t do anything about the caseload or class size. So, I just do what I can as I go along, one day, one student, one task at a time.
A saying I hear a lot is “Failure is not an option.” Interesting history behind that quote. It popped into my mind as I was working with a student on trying to see if he could read some words or be taught to read words. I was asked ab out what I was doing and why. He already did his GAA last year, so as far as accountability and academic standards, he could be counted as done. However, I simply had an innate desire to see what I could do with this student. I did it for the fun of it. A truly astounding concept in today’s educational climate, isn’t it? What sort of teacher does anything in the classroom for the fun of it, if it is not going to be on the almighty test? Especially when the likelihood of failure is pretty high.
I figured I had little to lose by working with this student, who enjoyed what I was doing with him, and it was worth a shot. The results are still inconclusive as to whether he was reading any of the words, such is the nature of working with nonverbal students. I’m talking words like go, up, more, down, come, and get. He can understand somewhat if you tell him to ‘get down’ from his chair, so these should not be too far out of reach if he is able to discriminate between the words. Anyway, failure is a total option in this exercise, but it is still worth doing. I can still learn a thing or two by doing it, which makes it only a failure in a conventional sense.
These are just the rambles of a teacher who is messing around and teaching…sometimes just for the fun of it!